navigating Sexual shame
Most of us have experienced it. And most of us would prefer to never relive or talk about sexual shame. I GET IT! But in order to experience the sex you desire, you have to learn how to properly navigate it. Navigating sexual shame can be a complex and personal journey, but here are some general steps and strategies I use when working with clients (1:1 and group) that can help:
1. Recognize and acknowledge shame: The first step is to become aware of and acknowledge any feelings of sexual shame that you may be experiencing. Understand that shame is a common and natural emotion, but it doesn't define your worth or identity.
2. Understand the source of shame: Reflect on the origins of your sexual shame. It could be influenced by societal norms, cultural or religious beliefs, past experiences, or messages received from family or peers. Understanding the root causes can help you challenge and reframe those beliefs.
3. Educate yourself: Educate yourself about sexuality, sexual health, and diverse sexual experiences. This knowledge can help you challenge any misconceptions or negative beliefs you may have about sex and empower you to make informed decisions about your own sexuality.
4. Seek support: Consider seeking support from a therapist, counselor, or a sex-positive community or support group. Talking openly about your feelings and experiences with a professional or like-minded individuals can provide validation, guidance, and a safe space to explore and address your sexual shame.
5. Practice self-compassion: Be kind and compassionate towards yourself as you navigate through your sexual shame. Remember that everyone has their own unique journey, and it's okay to make mistakes or feel vulnerable. Treat yourself with love and understanding, and practice self-care to nurture your overall well-being.
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6. Challenge negative beliefs: Challenge and reframe any negative beliefs or messages you have internalized about sex and your own sexuality. Replace them with positive and affirming thoughts that align with your values and desires. Surround yourself with supportive and sex-positive resources, such as books, podcasts, or websites, that promote healthy and consensual sexual experiences.
7. Communicate with your partner(s): If you're in a sexual relationship, open and honest communication with your partner(s) is crucial. Share your feelings and concerns about sexual shame, and work together to create a safe and non-judgmental space where you can explore and express your desires and boundaries.
8. Take small steps: Take small steps towards challenging your sexual shame. This could involve trying new sexual experiences, exploring your fantasies, or engaging in self-pleasure practices. Start at a pace that feels comfortable for you and gradually push your boundaries as you gain more confidence and self-acceptance.
Remember, navigating sexual shame is a personal journey, and it may take time and patience. Be gentle with yourself and celebrate each step forward towards embracing a healthier and more positive relationship with your sexuality. House of Pleasure is the PERFECT online community space to learn how to release your sexual shame. In this membership you will learn how to navigate conversations surrounding intimacy, how to initiate, how to foreplay, how to move your body for better sex (pole dance and chair dance classes for BEGINNERS!), AND SO MUCH MORE. House of Pleasure offers live and recorded trainings! $27 a month to better your sex life and relationship on your own time? DOESN’T GET BETTER THAN THIS! See you in class :)
